A Stangers Compliment

This morning I woke up with enough time to do something a little extra with my hair and makeup. This doesn't happen very often as I usually sleep in until 15 minutes til class. I tried a hairstyle that I've seen a few times on the internet. it consists of a headband going around your head and slightly over the forehead, the hair in the back is flipped into the headband making it an updo. I don't know if I really like it or not. I asked Angelene what she thought of it and she told me that its good and that I should keep it for the day, but why is it hard for me to find confidence in it when a friend obviously says its cute?

And why should we even care what our hair looks like? It's whats on the inside that counts right? Sometimes I just want to cut my hair short and leave it straight everyday, but I wouldn't be able to pull it off. It wasn't until a complete stranger told me she thinks my hair is cute, that I decided I like it. Why does it take a complete stranger to make me feel okay, rather than a friend I've known and trust forever? 

I guess it goes back to high school. There was a girl that I was friends with early on in high school, she would tell anyone when something looks bad. Now she wasn't a necessarily a mean girl, she would tell you if something looked good too. The bad thing was I constantly sought after her approval of everything. This didn't exactly build up my confidence. To this day I still talk to her, and I find myself snapchatting her to ask if something is cute. The other week I decided that I am not going to do this anymore. I need to find my own sense of what looks right and not. If I like something then, dammit, I'm going to wear it proud. But now I find myself seeking approval from elsewhere, like complete strangers. It's baby steps, eventually I will grow the confidence in myself to wear what I want and surround myself with people who don't care what the outside looks like.